They make it difficult to make decisions. They make it difficult to choose sides.
These are voices that can not be turned off. I knew they haunted me at a very young age.
July 1999, age 17.
Curse of the Gemini
They don't think the way I do. I don't live like they want me to.
They don't like the things I do-
I pretend not to care.
They like to tell me no. Say things like 'I don't think so.'
I say 'Maybe I'll just go.'
But I know I'll never get there.
I want him for all time. I'd walk through fire if it'd make him mine.
I'd forever stand in line,
but I don't tell him how I feel.
They think that I'm ok, that I'm happy every day.
That I always know what to say.
How I wish that that were real.
He thinks I'm strong and I'm alright. I only cry late at night.
I melt away when he's in sight.
Sometimes I want him to know.
I win almost every race. I don't get lost in any place.
A smile's always on my face-
I love being on the go.
Do I listen to my heart and soul? Or should I do what I'm told?
Am I young or am I old?
I can never decide.
I like the attention but stay out of sight, like freedom and being held tight.
I do what's wrong, cuz it feels so right.
Curse of the Gemini.
I'm weak but I look strong. I want to cry but carry on.
It's so dark, but I look beyond.
I know I'll never fall.
They lie and say that I'm great, say my life is headed straight.
The stories are completely fake,
and I want to tell them all.
And it's tearing me apart. The battle's ripping out my heart.
But I'll continue to play their part.
Someday they'll realize.
Someone always hates the truth. I don't know what way to choose.
I wish no one had to lose.
Curse of the Gemini.
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